Changes / Twenty Fourth Juz

As salaam alaikum,

Big changes in my life this Ramadan, alhamdulillah! Changes unexpected, changes that I'll hopefully be able to maintain...new, healthier attitudes that will hopefully help me to get where I need to be. But it is different than I've ever been before, so it will be an adjustment...

I hold fast to reminders such as these:

"All that they have ever yearned for awaits them with their Sustainer: such will be the reward of the doers of good. And to this end, God will efface from their record the worst that they ever did, and give them their reward in accordance with the best that they were doing [in life]." (39:34-35)

Insha'Allah, I will get to become a wife and mother. No matter how far or close to the ideal situation it shall be, as long as I am a believer, God will provide me with the best of companions in the Hereafter. Because that's pretty much all I've wanted in this life...companionship, life partnership, and to realize my reproductive and nurturing functions as a woman. All other desires were trivial, really. I barely wanted to enter medical school before God granted me that...

But even with this, I'm at peace knowing that God will provide me something better than I ever had on this earth the while I could live this life as a single, believing woman...

And for the first time, I have something tangible to hold onto.